diary 12 (june 13)

New York became even more alive in June it felt like- there was a place/party for me to be every day and everyone was celebrating the new season in my neighborhood. I rode my bike around all over and I got caught up in a few things that maybe I shouldn't have and that confused me, I'm usually so good at being in control of knowing what to do with people because I don't think about it. I spent most of the evenings avoiding things/people too much and it all left a bad feeling inside. I stayed up until and past the sunrise too many times. Half-way through the month I flew to LA to start a West Coast road trip with three friends. I stayed in a house that was empty and decorated with cacti everywhere, every day was different and is blended together. Every morning I walked to the same coffee place and sat outside on the patio under the umbrellas, drove everywhere, went to the beach and swam in the ocean for the first time, drove through Hollywood blasting music. Drove up to Santa Barbara, the back half of the house overlooked the ocean, I slept on the floor in between the little fleece blankets I stole from the airplane like it was a good idea, ate real meals at a home for the first time in a long time. Took the scenic route to San Fransisco and stayed in a home the was on the side of hills, I saw lizards in the backyard in the morning time. Took the train into the city every morning. The entire time I was meeting up with old and new mostly-photographer friends and it just feels very nice. My mind functions very differently when I am never alone. I wish I could write this out better I missed everything trying to put it down in words. I already miss every separate piece of June.